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250 Days Together Come to an End: Last Week Together – NFL, Vacation Pictures, Much Work – Dreams of Paris Hilton
SWOOP! Big swoop! Back to Tijuana and real life. Woke up to a million notifications after dreaming about Paris Hilton and her sister Nicky. They were running away from the paparazzi at LAX. I was just there returning for a flight but I also had my camera. So I started shooting her (Paris, Nicky who…
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Half Week Left, Vacation Mode Already On! – Word Vomit Coming to an End – CTM: Cindy Crawford
Alright, dude, you can do this! My girlfriend said she was going to work for this half week that we have left before OAXACA! She lied. She woke up early this morning and said, “I don’t want to go.” Or something like that. It was 4 am. I didn’t take notes. Point is, she decided…
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Gardening 101: Killing my Mint Plant – Material Luckily Gathered – Not My Cover: Burt Reynolds (Ryan Reynolds Instead)
I beat the fuck out of my mint plant… I hope it recovers. It already looks like it is recovering. The expensive soil I bought is much better than the shitty soil that I got in Mexico. The basil plant also looks much nicer. It looks like a little basil tree. The leaves are short…
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Swoop! Back to Reality – Paparazzo Me vs Now Me (Strange) – Gwen Stefani + Gavin Rossdale (and Kids)
Swoop! Back to reality! Girlfriend is at work. She went to bed before 7 pm. She woke up at 5 am to go to work. I went to bed at around 9:45 pm and woke up at 2:30 am and didn’t get great sleep. Finally got out of bed at 9 am. And swoop! Back…
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Beef Over Indulgence Sunday (Burger Research Continues) – This Weird Tijuana Life – Taylor Swift for Celebrity Throwback
Muddy shitty coffee after a slow shitty morning. I couldn’t get out of bed… And I didn’t have coffee. Got an email about not getting a job that I don’t even remember applying too. Well… that’s nice. Made my walk to Calimax bought coffee and some yogurt. And then watched Wet Hot American Summer for a…
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A Great Sunday of Bowling, Beisbol, and David the Neighbor Going Away Party (sad!) – Eclipse Vomit – Throwback Celebrity Monday is Zooey Deschanel!
The eclipse is supposed to be going on right now. I already looked at the sun twice and my eyes hurt. So fuck doing it again. Nope. I didn’t buy them special glasses. If I’m blinded. You know why it was. Because I’m dumb. Coffee coffee coffee. David, the neighbor, just showered in the apartment…
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Pot Brownies and Vodka Pasta – Jurassic World Movie Review – Celebrity Throwback: Bryce Dallas Howard
Monday, the middle of August and two-thirds done with the year. I wake up a little bit depressed and not sure why. It is probably my lack of productivity and the lack of desire to do anything about it. I was supposed to work on the weekend and I forgot about it. Didn’t get the…
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Lunch with a Millionaire – Hanging Out with my Cousin from Guadalajara – CThM Anne Hathaway
Alright! Monday! YEAH!! Time to work. It seems like Sundays of skipping the blog has become the norm. I wanted to change that. I thought about writing the blog post on the trolley but opted to read a book by Palahniuk (Lullaby). It’s an okay book so far. The least addicting from the few Palahniuk books…
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Weird Dreams Continue in Surrey, B.C. – 1300 Hours is Military Time – Created a Portfolio for Celebrities (with over 350 pictures)
It’s time to go to San Diego! Well soon… I need to word vomit and then I’ll be on my way. I have to be all the way to Camp Pendleton at 1300 hours. 1300 hours and not 1 pm because I’m meeting with military folk to see some military housing. Hopefully, spot a chopper.…
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MEH Feels – Foodie Weekend (Cine Tonalá and Oyster Porn) – Al Pacino and Giovani Ribisi
The feeling this morning is pretty meh. Girlfriend left very early because her job is switching her to France hours. I woke up at around 5 am but forced myself to sleep until 8 am. Bisho has been puking all over the place. It’s now 10 am and I don’t see where this week is…
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The Adventures of Dani and Dani – A Childhood Friend and Memories – Random Picture of Billy Crystal
Alright. Back at it. Fucking Monday. Yep. I skipped yesterday! I have guests! And I had to entertain! Guests are still here. One snoozes on the couch, the other in my roommate’s bedroom (sorry roommie). They are on their way to California to do a seasonal job. A job that I want to do. You…
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My Girlfriend Spams Me – Reading All About Korn – Munky is Today’s Celebrity Monday
My girlfriend started spamming everyone she has on Facebook messenger yesterday while we were out and about. I have no idea why she was doing it and told her to stop. She sent a picture of the sushi she had that I posted on the Tijuana Adventure page. This one: Her reasoning: She hasn’t talked…
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Hanging Out With Bryan – Fuck 182 – Amanda Crew (Do You Know Her?!)
Alright! Word vomit time. I have absolutely no plans or have no idea what I’m about to type. Let’s see how this goes. Yesterday my girlfriend and I hung out with Bryan. Bryan only reads this blog after we hung out because he likes to read that he got mentioned. Hey, Bryan. You made it…
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Skipped My Blog For Two Days Because Work and Lazy – Birthday Boy Got To Work – B.J. Novak in Tijuana (Bonus: Mindy Kaling)
I skipped my blog for two days. That’s the first time that I skipped two days in the same week. I skipped Friday (though I wrote it on Friday and published on Saturday morning). That makes it a total of 10 skips (I believe… let’s say 10). Saturday was understandably way busier than Friday (for…
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Time Wasting Monday – Netflix, Rain, Cold, And Drunk – Telling Shitty Jokes to Bradley Cooper
A gallon of coffee and pizza for breakfast. It seems like I drink coffee more and more for less of the effect. It feels like Sunday. Mostly because I “worked” on Saturday. And by worked, I mean I partied. But hey. I got paid for it so yes, it is work. I have another work/party…
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Emo Taxi – Secret Admirer? Nah, Troll. – Kim Zolciak
I’m emotionally spent. I was in an emo taxi. As I was emotionally taxed. In a Dashboard Confessional mixed with Death Cab for Cutie kinda mood but in Mexico. If I had an emo band in Mexico, I would call it “El Taxi de Memo.” Yeah. After pouring out my feelings in a word vomit…
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Pretty People and Creepy Twins at a Throwback LA Party – World is a Real Shit – Mila Jovovich
We both woke up thinking the same thing. Board games. I had dreams about controlling the yellow army on Risk. We couldn’t even finish the game of Risk. It was getting too long and ridiculous. The yellow army basically was left untouched, and I guess that carried into my dreams of world domination by controlling…
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Oh Shit! April Already – Emotionally Drained and Nelson Drama – Amanda Peet
Okay! Let’s get this Monday started! I stink. I should shower. Push-ups. Shower. Mexican pizza for breakfast. Babe is at work. She had to fire someone today, but the girl quit before she could fire her. She got called a horrible boss and a bitch. She’s fine though. The girl that she hired (from what…
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The Calamity – Fighting is Healthy, Right? – Paparazzi Gangbang Katie Price
OHHH the calamity! We fought yesterday, basically after publishing my blog. It had nothing to do with the blog post. It was actually really silly. We fought because all my clothes have holes in them and I wear shirts way too small for my size. And well… Though I am changing the way I dress…
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Water Back and Weekend Continues – Cover Story Soon – Joan Rivers
My girlfriend has the day off this Monday. It’s apparently a holiday in Mexico. The birth of Benito Juárez and the first day of spring. The first day of spring is not today. It’s tomorrow. Benito Juárez wasn’t born today. It was tomorrow. Mexicans just like to pepper holidays whenever they feel like it. So…
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Sunday Karaoke Mess – Up In the Air – David Carradine
She’s up in the air right now. Flying to Mexico City. Well… actually towards Morelia first and then connecting to Mexico City. Fucking Volaris canceled her 7:00 am flight after waking up at 5 am and rushing her out the door so she didn’t miss her flight. We had a fight last night. The worst…
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Ever Met Someone And Spent 30+ Nights Together? (Fuck this Blog)
I skipped a day. That’s the 3rd day of the year that I don’t write on my blog. On a Saturday. And it is starting to feel like a daily blog is pointless. Somewhat dumb. Unnecessary. Who is paying me? No one obviously. Who would pay me for such stupid word vomit? My Saturday wasn’t…
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Overwhelming Dreams and Thoughts – Cover Story Soon – Top 5 Sushis in Los Angeles (2010 era)
I had way too many dreams. Cool dreams. Some cool nightmares. Nightmares were silly, because I think it was a video game. I was controlling a tank that was very similar to the Star Fox Landmaster. I had to zig-zag between giant pillars that had hundreds of massive cockroaches entangled on a spider web. The idea…
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Just a Diary – Billions Show – Malin Åkerman
This is just a diary. A daily word vomit. One that I can’t stop posting every single day. It does not pretend to be anything else but my morning thoughts. Sometimes is in the afternoon. But for the most part I write all of this while I have my morning coffee. Before I shower. While…
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Work Week Starts with Shit Weather – Oscars + Trump – Jon Hamm
Shit. I just discovered this. It’s real good: Here is yesterday’s brunch. The beans were better than the poached eggs on the muffin. But still pretty bomb. The place was real pretty (Dante’s Raw Bar and Gastro Food). Yep. That. After brunch we just did laundry, clean the house, ordered pizza, bought beers, and watched Netflix.…
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