21 Weeks, 1 Day.
I haven’t written anything since I got back.
I haven’t done much since I got back…
I thought I was coming back to a mountain of work. I was worried about my car registration. Not only was it lost and suspended, but it also needed a renewal. I crossed the border Thursday a day after getting back to the DMV. Border crossing took me less than an hour. DMV took me less than 15 minutes.
I had an appointment and was a few minutes early. After getting my number and writing my information, I waited less than ten minutes to be called. Then the lady that attended me was wonderful. There was a tiny error with my VIN registration with Geico and that’s why my registration was suspended. She made me promise I would change it with Geico ASAP. I paid my dues. Got my stickers. And Donatella is good to go for another year.
I changed the Geico registration a day later.
Donatella is insured and good to go.
And I love driving. I just don’t have nowhere to go.
I’ve been sleeping a lot.
And drinking a lot.
And not eating very healthy.
I haven’t cooked anything since I got back.
I mostly just go through the motions of life. Wake up. Coffee. Emails. Shower. Mini work out. Tacos. Repeat.
I worked for two days only. Wednesday and Thursday. Two extensive photoshoots each day. And also delivery.
I need to work more. I already emailed the boss that I am leaving sales for a while. Need to concentrate on writing…
So far… I have two articles published this year. More than half of the year is gone…
I just checked. I guess I have 4 so far this year. It feels like forever ago.
I think of my past more than my future. My future just looks grey. There’s not much to be excited for. I have no interest in anything.
Sleep. Play Starcraft II. Go on the internet for hours. Do nothing. Drink. Play Starcraft II. Get destroyed. Get a bit depressed. Rinse. Repeat.
I’m not really even depressed.
Nothing seems to excite me.
Perhaps is still the post traveler blues. It’s been two weeks. I haven’t been doing anything.
I think of my past.
I think of my ex.
How in love I was and how difficult is to feel that again.
I think of Bumble girl and how she almost achieved that. Then I think of another ex. And go back to the previous one.
And I think of an old lover. Or lovers. Or ones that weren’t. Or ones that rejected me. Or that ones that were going to be and yet didn’t happen. And of the current one.
And here I am. Just getting older. Wondering if mistakes were made or they were correct decisions. Life. Just keeps going. Everyone getting married. And I’m here sitting with my cats.
And I obviously think of my mom. It’s still surreal for her to be gone. Like I have shit to tell her still. It’s like she was the only one that actually cared.
It’s still a clear distinction of my past. 21 weeks, 1 day. When life suddenly changed. And everything tastes somewhat different…
A cover picture of mine came out while I was away.
Here it is:
It’s not my favorite. More pics in the inside are better. More pics from that set are better.
That’s cover #10 this year.
And on Wednesday I got great pictures for a feature story and I am almost certain that a picture that I loved will be the cover.
That one I will like.
I’m proud of that one… if they publish it.
You can tell I’m not very inspired…
I played guitar at Nelson Bar. It was a Monday.
My days have been a blur.
And I do wake up feeling like having a drink.
But I wake up late.
Yes. I played guitar after not playing for months. It felt nice. It was a bit inspiring. Mariachi guy was singing and playing with his buddy chugging down mixed drinks and Tecate Lights with ice.
Alex, the bartender, mentioned that I played guitar. Mariachi guy handed me his guitar.
Nice guitar. Big resonating box. Needed better strings. But perfect for mariachi guitar.
It was good for classical as well.
I got sweaty.
I got nervous.
I still jammed for a bit.
Then the bar got loud. You can’t hear shit of classical when the bar is loud. But I kept playing.
Mariachi guy liked it a lot. I made a fan.
We went back and forth with the guitar. Because I don’t know dick about mariachi songs. I don’t know many party songs… And whenever I get a guitar, I forget all the songs I know. I just can’t think of them…
So I played the little repertoire of classical that I remember.
On a stool at a bar. Not very comfortable. Couldn’t even hear myself. But it was fun.
Selene, the other bartender, arrived and started singing with the mariachis. Then I said I could learn a song so she can sing it. She wanted an Amy Winehouse song. Chicks love singing Amy Winehouse’s song. The whole song is in Dm (to a Gm to a Bb7 and an A7) done!
It’s a fun easy jazzy progression. It’s super easy to improve on top of that.
Well… I didn’t nail it at Nelson. But I came home, looked up the song (Back in Black), and learned it in a second.
Not the whole thing. At the late bridge or something the chord progression changes. I didn’t even hear the whole fucking song. Just jammed out with that chord progression. FOREVER. And tried to sing. I can actually do my own version of that song.
Here’s the thing though.
I don’t even really like the song.
Weird that I haven’t written shit in so long. I feel the need to update.
But there’s nothing.
When I came home, the place was a mess. Yes. Cats have been living by themselves for a while. I cleaned that very same day. And I’m still not done cleaning.
The apartment is still full of my mom’s stuff. I want to move out.
I should clean some more. Enjoy my Sunday. And try to work.
Hi Gaby Blue!
Sorry, this was a boring post!
Life got dull.