(Monday)
I want to write… but it’s difficult at the moment.
I think my girl is missing…
I had a great tour on Saturday. It was a bachelor party tour. College-educated people from all over the US. Childhood friends. College friends. Beer drinking friends. Vacation to San Diego and bachelor party for a day in Tijuana. We didn’t go to Zona Norte. Not what the bachelor is into. Or the rest of the guys (two of them were gay).
The tour ended around 9ish or 10ish pm. I lost track of time. It was a hella fun tour. This is what it looks like. Through TikTok.
Nice. WordPress lets me include TikTok links.
Before the tour, on Friday, I spent the day and night with the new girl. The one that is ten years younger than me instead of ten years older.
It went great. I like her a lot.
A week ago, I muttered words that I don’t remember ever muttering in my life. “¿Quieres ser mi novia?”
I asked her that. She got nervous. Asked me a bunch of questions. But never really truly answered yes or no. I told her she didn’t need to worry about answering.
I picked her up on Friday. We said goodbye on Saturday before my tour. She was going to the sobreruedas en la Zona. And we were going to see each other that night or Sunday or soon. Or so I hoped.
I texted her before leaving for my tour. She replied.
I texted her throughout the tour. No answer at all.
I texted her after the tour. No answer at all.
I texted her good night. No answer at all.
I texted her Sunday morning. No answer at all.
Maybe she lost her phone. Maybe she needs space.
I texted her to just let me know if she was okay. No answer at all.
Monday morning. Because of Memorial Day, I know she’s not working. Texted her. Called her. No answer at all. I told the only guy I know that knows her. A friend of hers. No answer at all.
He says not to worry. But I can’t help but worry. I’m going to try to find her at her place later today because I’m worried. She hasn’t been online or on social media. She hasn’t read my texts. They are not “seen” just sent. The last time she was online was 8:25 pm on Saturday according to WhatsApp.
Fuck this. I just want to know that she’s alright.
May has been very busy. Donatella (my car) passed smog. It was quite an adventure but she’s doing alright, mechanic says she will run for a long time, and that I’ll see him in two years for another smog check.
The car passed smog one day before the deadline. I paid for my renewal registration an hour before the deadline. After the tour, I was about to go to sleep, when I remember. Fuck. I need to pay for my car registration.
Paying for the registration + smog check + mechanic fees to fix it. I’m broke again. Tour money will have me a little unbroke. I have another tour on Saturday. And I have a few gigs. So I should recover swiftly. At least I have work to do.
But I can’t help but just worry about her right now…
There’s a new Drinking Beer with Matingas. I just uploaded it.
I also uploaded an old video that Facebook found for me. It’s probably my best interpretation of Bohemian Rhapsody that I have on video.
I am pretty sure I was waiting for a better version to upload to YouTube. A more professional version. I can’t play that song at all anymore. It would take me daily practice for at least an hour for a whole month to get it to what it was. Perhaps even more.
Saving draft. I’m going to go look for her.
(Tuesday)
I spent my afternoon looking for her outside her apartment. I didn’t see a sign of her. Because I didn’t want to be a creep, I started telling her friends and whoever I could that she is missing. First through personal messages. Then started posting publicly. My posts started spreading like wildfire.
I don’t want the attention. Much less this sort of attention. She doesn’t want the attention. Any type of attention. Just mine. I hope.
Her friends haven’t heard from her. No one has. I’m worried as fuck.
Her brother finally reached out to me late last night. He was skeptical at first. “The fuck you want with my sister?” Type of skepticism. Like I’m the one looking to harm instead of to help. I told him to call me. He did. I explained everything.
From all the things I talk about with her, though it’s mostly music… we talked about Dante and Vergil from Devil May Cry. I barely played those games. But I used to play Dante in the vanilla Marvel vs Capcom 3 (I dropped him off my main chars in the Ultimate version). I know she likes Vergil.
At some point… she told her brother I liked Dante. Because he asked. “You are the guy that likes Dante?” I was confused. For a second I thought she was dating someone else. And then he said from Devil May Cry. And I had a flashback to that snippet of a conversation.
Such irrelevancy. But at some point, she talked to her brother and told him she was seeing someone and told her that snippet of irrelevant information.
I woke up early. I usually wake up early and with not much to do, I snooze for another hour or two before getting up to make coffee, feed the cats, and start emailing, writing, editing, and working.
All I want to know is if she’s alright.
Saving this as a draft and coming back to it later.
Fucking shit. I can’t stop crying.
Relief crying.
She finally texted me. As if nothing. “Hey.”
Just minutes after I hit saved draft… she finally texted me.
It was as simple as she didn’t have her charger and she didn’t care about checking her phone. One of the reasons I like her. She’s never on the phone like other people. She told me it’s because she wants to enjoy her time with me.
When I’m with her, I’m not on the phone. Except to put music on YouTube. And to look up stuff because she’s curious and I don’t have all the answers. She asks me everything about everything. Especially if people are still alive. I play a song. She wants to know if they are still alive. And if they are, if they are still playing together. That’s how I found out fucking Green Jelly is still together. This Green Jelly:
Oh yeah. She studied music. And has a true curiosity for more music to feed her soul.
I haven’t cried this much in a while. I still cry often about my mom. But I can control it. It’s usually in the mornings or at night. Sometimes it hits me midday, but I can control it.
I can’t control it right now. I’m still crying tears of relief.
Better. Much better now. Just hungry. I didn’t eat much yesterday. I couldn’t. I went to nearby restaurants from her place. I asked the businesses around if they’d seen her… There is a restaurant just in front. Thought about eating there with a view of her place in case I saw her. But didn’t. I just stayed outside her place.
When one of her friends arrived, I asked him to stay put in case she shows up. I went to one of her favorite restaurants nearby to ask if they’d seen her. They said no, but did recognize the girl.
Her friend had to leave. So I just stayed outside for hours for any sign of life. When my cellphone was low on battery and it was getting late, I left.
I had the worst thoughts for a while. I was preparing for the worst. I was very afraid. It’s scary times in Mexico. It’s on the news daily. Femicides and women (and girls) getting kidnapped everywhere in this country.
In Mexico, you are afraid of horrible insecurity and violence caused by poverty, lack of education, and a shit government. In America, you are afraid of getting shot in any public place caused because of an insane amount of guns, senseless violence, lack of education, poverty, and a shit government.
And look. It’s an endless debate in America. But it’s obvious. Fewer guns. Less violence. “THEN WHY DO MEXICO?” Cuz it’s your neighbor and Mexico has been getting guns from the United States forever. Mexico doesn’t have school shootings though (there was the one in Monterrey).
I have friends with guns. I have friends that ADORE their guns. I don’t like guns. But I’m okay if you like them and have a license and regulation for it.
Fucking shit. What a May. It’s the last day of May. I’m supposed to go to the baseball game later tonight with my friend Tony. Let’s see if that happens. That went alright on TikTok. It’s one of my most-watched videos after the rats video.
This is the rats video.
I like how WordPress lets you post TikTok stupid things. So much social media. I’ve been posting paparazzi stories in an attempt to sell more books. It’s… sorta working? I haven’t sold books but definitely generated a lot of interest. And I’m getting a ton of followers. Though I’m not sure what qualifies as a ton on TikTok. A steady 10+ a day.
Here’s my latest paparazzi story, Lindsay Lohan. I should do part 2 in a minute. It’s not that easy to do.
Finally, after all the drama. And sorry for all the drama. This blog needs a picture. I would post a shitty picture of this us. But we don’t have pictures together. Because like I mentioned, the relationship has barely started. So… 180° turn. FUN!
I photographed the fun issue!
It was a FUN but arduous shoot. 5 pm is not ideal for a photoshoot. Not in an open park. Not when the sun is that harsh. But somehow, I made it work. Out of like 150+ pictures, they chose that one. All the people that made it happen were awesome. I’m glad about the final results. I also did more photoshoots for other clients. And still need more. I have a photoshoot this Thursday and a tour this Saturday.
Tours. Photoshoots. Music. Writing. Patreon. And more.
I feel silly advertising my Patreon and businesses after all that shit… but you know it:
If you like me or my blog or my videos or pictures or whatever and want to support me… Please do so on Patreon (Click Here!). My drunk ass heavily appreciates it as I still don’t have a real income. Making it as an “artist” is not easy. Every $ is appreciated. And if you want to see me naked, now you can on the Patreon premium, though that might get deleted soon.
Matingas 