It’s still fucking March.
It’s the last day of March. But it’s still March. February went fast, March seemed like it lasted forever.
I woke up early today. I got interviewed by Amelia, a journalism student from City, University of London. She found my Reddit Ask Me Anything about being a paparazzi.
This Reddit post. Re-reading that. I repeat myself a lot. It’s an interesting post.
I repeat myself a lot.
And I talk a lot.
Reading old blog posts. I also always say the same. How I am lost in life. In the path that I have chosen. And that’s how I am at the moment. Almost broke like always. But going on the right path.
This blog has had a shit ton of visitors the past weeks for some fucking reason. Hi all. Welcome to non-sense.
I woke up earlier yesterday. After not sleeping. I had to wake up at 6 a.m. to head to the US Embassy in Tijuana to renew my passport. I tried going to bed at midnight, didn’t until 2 a.m. Woke up at 3 a.m… and went back to bed for a bit.
For those who live in Tijuana and need to renew their passport, the US Embassy is a great choice. I scheduled my appointment two weeks prior. It was at 7:45 a.m. No cellphones are allowed and there is a ton of paperwork to do prior. Ok. Not that much. But since I never do shit like this, it felt like a lot.
Got there at 7:30 since it says to show up 15 minutes early to your appointment. There was already a long line out the door. It took me more than 30 minutes to finally talk to the person in the window. I don’t really know exactly what time it was since I didn’t have my phone with me!
Everyone in the line had appointments around the same time. So, even if you schedule your appointment at a different time, you want to show up early.
After reviewing my paperwork, they let me in. And after that. It was a DMV experience without a phone. Get a ticket. Wait to get called. Talk to the person in the window. Pay your fees. Pay the delivery service. And now I wait.
In three or four weeks I should have a new passport card and a new passport book. I haven’t been able to travel internationally because I didn’t have a passport book. I couldn’t get my Global Entry because I didn’t have my passport book.
It’s like a huge weight off my shoulders to finally get my fucking passport.
But wait!
There’s more weight.
APRIL has nothing.
I’m low on cash. I have enough to pay April rent and pay other shit. But I can’t live life comfortably since I don’t know where my next paycheck is going to come from. It feels like I’m making more money than before, then I just spend it all. Somehow. Or I’m not making as much money as I think I am.
I worked Friday and Saturday for a nice paycheck. It rescued my month. I wish every Friday and Saturday were like that. I worked on Tuesday. All three were photoshoots I got on my own. I need to get way more like this.
There is nothing for April with the Reader. Just one boring photoshoot that I’ll do at some point. I did a photoshoot this Tuesday and it will be the cover next week.
There hasn’t been a cover shot by me in a while. I took awesome pictures of a tennis dude… and that cover apparently got canceled.
I did 19 photoshoots this March. 11 were paid. The others were collab. Or selfies. Or that Ensenada adventure I had with that woman.
I earned $1,550 from photoshoots in March. That’s pretty damn good. I should have not paid my student loans. That and paying for my passport is the reason it feels like I’m broke. Between those two, I spent $455. Fuck my student loans.
I still have more shit and debt to fix. Fuck. I’m so broke.
I tried fixing this website. It didn’t work. Is still a mess. At least the homepage is not my blog anymore. But just my Photographer intro. I need to make it way prettier.
I tried fixing the Tijuana Adventure website. That also didn’t go as planned.
I have extreme sadness today. At least it’s not depression. I’m still fighting that bitch. Though I’m sad, I did laundry, cleaned the toilet and shower, went to buy coffee, made more coffee, drank more coffee, watched some YouTube, and posted shit on my four Instagrams. I’m starting to regret having four Instagrams.
I have no gigs for April. If you need a photographer in the San Diego / Tijuana area, hit me up. Or a tour guide. Or a writer of anything. I’m too fucking broad and I’ll continue to be broad. I can cover it all.
I’m sad despite having a good weekend. Like always, it’s money issues. But I’ll be alright and I know it. I could always gets a fucking job. I’m on the brink of getting a fucking job.
This was Friday night.
There was no border line, twenty minute wait. Bliss for border crossers. And the night was hella fun. Though my pictures could have been better. I always think my pictures can be better.
I loved this place regardless of them paying me or not. And I will use it as a border stop if there’s traffic going to Tijuana.
And the show was great as well. I’m not huge on Tool but I do enjoy it. And they sounded like a great Tool cover band. Then the Rage Against the Machine band was very fantastic. And there was a closer that was okay. I got great pictures despite my flash being a bitch. I dropped it a long time ago and now the recycle time is painfully slow. Like more than 20 seconds to recycle after flashing. So I shot over 700 frames but like a good 100 frames are complete darkness because my flash is acting like a bitch.
Still. I get to listen to cool bands and jump around the crowd with my camera doing one of my favorite things to do, long exposure flashes. Most of the pictures were 1/3 of a second at 400 ISO and I play around with the aperture for different results.
That was my Friday and Saturday. And I got paid for it. And I loved it.
Hire me so all my Fridays and Saturdays are like that. I have nothing on my April schedule (again).
This is my fourth day sober. Not really sober, because I’m still drinking a shit ton of coffee and smoking a lot of weed. And I had some chocoshrooms yesterday. This post needs a picture. My website needs to be fixed. My other website also needs to get fixed. Or I can just fucking give up and get a real job.
My OnlyFans got taken down. It was really my Patreon. But Patreon sent me a confusing message telling me that nudity is allowed just not lewd nudity. And I guess one of the photos I posted was a bit too lewd. I guess I’ll need to take artistic nudes instead of just showing my dick. Gay guys loved that photo though. And some straight girls as well.
But my Patreon has more than just that!
If you like me or my blog or my videos or pictures or whatever and want to support me… Please do so on Patreon. My drunk ass heavily appreciates it as I still don’t have a real income. Making it as an “artist” is not easy. Every $ is appreciated. And if you want to see me naked, now you can.
Once I make it. The rewards will be grand.
There will be a new drinking beer with Matingas soon… I promise!!! Or not so soon since I’m not drinking and I don’t have much money.
I go to therapy tomorrow. Every time I go, I’m the brokest I’ve been in a while.
Oh. And about the romance I had in Ensenada. It didn’t stay there. We still see each other. But we had one little fight that wasn’t really a fight and I haven’t seen her in a while. It’s okay though. If you read my blog, you know how my love life goes. I am not worried. I am more concerned about making money and making it through this fucking crazy life.
Thanks for reading. This post still needs a picture. Here’s a selfie I took before shaving.
I thought shaving would make me look younger. It didn’t. It reminded me of how old I am. It doesn’t bode well with my haircut. And I look much more like my mom.
Obviously, still missing her a shit ton. Stupid life.
Matingas 