Whole Lot of Nothing and Everything – Cover Picture Out Today (Cover Love Story Out Soon) – NFL Fantasy Güiching Auer

I sold one book all of November. And it wasn’t even my new book, it was the Tijuana Adventure book. You can buy that HERE.

Or my new book, here!

The Amazon rating for my books is the lowest it has ever been. Neither of them are on the top #100 of their category.

How sad.

And I thought I would get rich with my awesome writing.


Back to promoting it. The next chapter to post on my Instagram is Ashley Tisdale. She’s a boring celebrity. It’s a short read of a chapter.

I have a lot of folders of Tisdale… Que weva editarlo. Que weva la vida.

After Tisdale, a chapter of Bog Saget, Donald Faison, and Zach Braff. I don’t have many pictures of them. That will be a short edit. And that’s a fun chapter. The blog post from years ago keeps getting visitors daily. Just because I paired the word Donald Faison with the word dick or penis at some point.

I didn’t write the NFL summary in Spanish last week. Simbos wanted to do it because I lost against him. I was going to do it, but he said he would so I also ended up skipping my blog. A lot of shit happens and at the same time, nothing happens.

I tell that to my therapist every time.

I skipped my session by accident. I completely forgot about it. This was two Fridays ago. I was so obsessed with flying and editing drone pictures that I woke up to work on it and forgot I had therapy. We did therapy via Zoom, but it wasn’t the same.

And every single time.

I tell her that a lot happened and at the same time nothing happened.

The year is almost over and I’m still not sure where I’m going with everything. My books don’t sell. My story sold and will be published hopefully soon. A photo I took in my studio of a Real Estate agent/friend is on the cover. That should be fun. The cover after that should also be my photo. Then December.

Then the year ends.

Fuck 2020 everyone says.

But I said fuck 2019 as well.

And the year before that.

Not that long ago I was enamored with that crush of mine. I still think she still a catch and I want her to be my girlfriend, but it won’t happen. I’m old and I moved on so many times that it was easy to do so again.

Also, I’m fucking good looking. That’s a plus. Though I’m growing my beard and it looks like shit, I don’t care.

I should go to the barber to get that fixed.

My work sent me to Ramona. That will be the cover next week. Because I was already all the way over there, I decided to go to Julian for some apple pie and to fly the drone. It was too windy to fly. There was a long line for apple pie. It was still a good day.

I drove around and flew around Julian and it’s surroundings. I found a nice lake to fly around but a sign clearly said “no drone zone.” Stupid. But oh well.

Here are the pics:

The next day, the sunset looked killer, so I went on top of Calle 4ta to fly around. I liked the pictures though Instagram wasn’t that much of a fan.

And the day after that… A girl I dated briefly last year came over for a photoshoot. Though things ended up not amicably, time passed and we went full circle to friends again. The photoshoot was dope though she gets shy around me and doesn’t pose as good as she could. I like the pictures. I like my studio though it’s worthless since I don’t have clients.

I don’t know what to do.

Wild shit happened the day after.

A friendly and odd dude I barely know invited me to his bday party in Rosarito. I was feeling lazy and thinking about skipping it, but he posted that he cooked giant crab legs. That and that I wanted to fly around convinced me that I should make the trip. I arrived to find a small party of a dude and his wife, two girls, and the bday dude. The dude with the wife was wasted already. He was fun.

I gave bday dude my book as a gift and flew around before sunset.

It was too fucking windy to fly again and a bit nippy, so I just did a quick flight and joined the party.

The party slowly grew to include more girls that came from Tijuana or Mexicali. And then the cousins of the bday dude. I didn’t notice or I didn’t want to notice that the hottest girl at the party was the bday guy’s date thing. Or not even sure. Bday guy seemed to want her but she seemed to reject him a bit. We chatted. We flirted. We got drunk. I don’t even remember how it happened. But wild things happened.

At some point I just said to myself (and to her) I can’t do this to bday dude though I barely know him. And exited a room. Then he entered the room. It got all awkward after that. I felt like one of the cousins of the bday dude wanted to fight me. I kept getting drunk and disregarded it all with a shrug as the party spiraled into oblivion.

I saw an older dude passing out on a couch. That older dude was a chill dude.

Too many dudes.

This story makes no sense for a reason.

I laid down on a couch next to the older dude and we chatted until we both slept.

I woke up alone in the living room early in the morning. Found some water because my mouth was dry as fuck. And left.

The weather was super nice to fly around, but I was too hungover to fly (or drive). Also, the NFL was starting that morning.

What a nice transition.

NFL de Fantasía time. First, I should edit some Ashley Tisdale pictures and have some breakfast. Then writing more stupid shit for the sake of writing stupid shit.

Holy fuck Rocket League addiction. After breakfast, I was just going to play a couple of games and go back to work. That turned to almost 4 non-stop hours of just Rocket League. After two hours, I decided I should do “Rocket League workout.” I used to do something similar with Call of Duty. In between matches, I would do as many push-ups or sit-ups as I could. Sit-ups usually the number of kills and push-ups the number of deaths. This time I’m just going to do planks, push-ups, and sit-ups while waiting for the next match which is usually over a minute.

Rocket League workout and I’ll be ripped. Especially because I’m so addicted I can see myself playing countless hours. I want to go play right now instead of writing this stupid shit.

A new cover for the Reader came out. Finally, a picture I took. I took this picture in my apartment studio with the white backdrop I bought from George’s Camera. The art director switched the background to look like a house somewhere in SD (I guess).

This is the new cover:

Thanks to Michel for posing in my studio for it!

I like it!


ENEFELE de Fantasía Semana #10

Como dice Scott Hanson en NFL Zona Roja, es “da güiching auer,” cuando las victorias se convierten en derrotas y las derrotas en victorias. Excepto esto es “da güiching güiks.” Ya nada más quedan 3 partidos por jugar y luego los playoffs. Por ahora, Mariobot pasa directo a las semifinales (no asegurado) y todo lo demás esta en el aire para que pueda pasar de todo. El analista con estilo Sanchez no me hizo tablita de excel entonces no estoy seguro que resultado necesita cada quién. Suerte a todos.

Tijuana Pimps 116.02 vs 94.76 Miami DolphLundgrens

Debo admitir que perdí la fé. No solo de el partido, pero de ya de todo el torneo. Todo empezó mal (menos el jueves donde AJ Café no hizo nada). Mucho viento en Cleveland hizo que Watson no pudiera tirar pases. Lindsay y McKinnon me hicieron 5.80 puntos entre los dos. Y el Pelón con un Cocinero mejor RB de la liga… dije… ahí quedó. Errores de banca de el Pelón me mantuvieron vivo, pero seguía sin fé. Mis dos WRs estrellas no producían lo que tenían que hacer. Le daba más fé al parlay de mi carnal. Y luego paso. Paso el pase. De Allen a Diggs en el último minuto de el juego para darle la victoria a los Bills y darme puntos muy necesitados. Si lo puedo ganar, pero Hopkins no hizo nada. Y luego paso. Paso el segundo pase. Hail Mary de Murray a Hopkins entre 3 defensores de los Bills y el milagro de último segundo. Ganan los Cardinals. Mis dos WRs sumaron 51 puntos entre los dos. Me regresaron la fé y me regresaron a 7timo lugar. El Pelón se queda en 5to. Ambos con partidos dificiles y cruciales adelante (los dos tenemos que enfrentar a Mariobot).

Zavasaurus FT 122.40 vs 100.08 The Lion King

The Lion King se fue disipando lentamente hasta caer donde esta, casi hasta abajo (si no fuera por la mala suerte de Guarren). 3 partidos seguidos perdidos y con el puntaje mas bajo. Draft #1 riesgoso escogiendo a CEH, movimientos calculados, siempre peligroso… pero este año simplemente no. Funciona mejor ofrecer trades aleatorios y locos para ver si pegan y ser Zavasaurus ganando. El partido no dio mucho que hablar. Creo que ni le puse atención, solo me fije que The Lion King no sumaba y parecía que Zavala se lo llevaba desde el inicio.

CDMX Ocelopilli 95.70 vs 99.44 Sanchez Style

El Estilo Sanchez otra ves se equivoca de QB, banqueando a un emputado Tom Brady y metiendo a un Abrejas delicado. No rompe el 100 por errores de banca, pero aseguro la victoria el lunes con su WR de los ositos que no hizo mucho, pero mucho no era necesario. Segundo partido que pierde Mariobot, segundo partido que no rompe 100 puntos. ¿Será este el trayecto de lo que fue la fuerza inicial de Mariobot? Aunque pierda los siguientes tres seguidos, queda en los playoffs (creo, alguien no me hizo tablita de excel). Estilos tiene que pelear para quedar en los playoffs. Y la suerte de el fantasy, casi todos los partidos de arriba de la tabla juegan contra los de arriba, y los de abajo… pss con los de abajo.

Don Bacardi’s Team 139.06 vs 114.12 Queretaroosters

Hablando de abajo… Queretaroosters regresa a sus rumbos de la tabla y Don Bacardi trepa a donde no ha estado todo el año. Tres partidos seguidos que pierde el Roosters. Nada es lo mismo desde que perdió a su dupla de Chubb y Mixon. También no le gusta hacer movimientos, lleva solo 5 en todo el año mientras todos los demás llevan mas de 19 (Zavasaurus con 51). Don Bacardi y Zavasaurus hasta hicieron un trade interesante que le funcionó mas a Zavala ya que se lesionó Johnson, pero el karma de hacer un trade bonito le ha dado suerte de estar ganando. Desde que hizo ese movimiento la fé se restoró y empezó a ganar. Las vaqueritas están perdidas, pero Don Bacardi puede que salga de su cruda eterna a llevarse el campeonato.

The Mongooses 111.98 vs 99.82 Jaiba Brava

Las estrellas de la Jaiba no le funcionaron. El no estrella casi le saca el gané el lunes, pero necesitaba mucho más. The Mongooses apenas hizo los puntos de su piso, pero fue suficiente contra Jaiba que no rompió el 100. No ha tenido a Miguel Tómas todo el año y se nota que lo ha extrañado. El que no quería jugadores dramaticos acabo con Toño Café y Miguel Tómas y quería al Campana. Aunque varios equipos ya cenaron Jaibita, ahí sigue Brava a la mitad de la tabla y con ganas de playoffs. El último juego para la Jaiba es contra su propio hermano Estilos. El Classic Sánchez puede que defina quién se queda en los playoffs y quién deja de ver NFL por el resto de el año.

Guarren Luna 99.96 vs 98.56 Queretaro Thunders

El drama de dramas pero de dramas. Meto a mi hermano al fantasy y lo hago adicto a un juego de numeritos y de NFL. Mi carnal ya es adicto a muchos otros deportes, ahora sumale numeritos. Ahora sumale que le dije que hiciera parlays y ahora esta traumado. Y estos dramas no le ayudan. Parece que todos los juegos los tiene que ganar o perder por un punto de diferencia. ¿Seguíra su drama? ¿Será el comeback de película? ¿Clutch City?! Guarren hasta abajo de la tabla vence al fuertisimo segundo lugar Thunders por poco. Una mezcla de resultados y con mucha suerte Guarren pasa de panzaso… y de ahí al campeonato?! Ya veremos. Falta poco. Y aunque Thunders se ve comodo en segundo lugar, no hay que confirarse.

Cierre de temporada muchachos. Se pone mas que interesante. Estaría bien ver una tablita de excel para saber que tiene que pasar con cada quien y seguir analizando esos numeritos.


(Yell it a la Mr. Poopy Butthole).

NFL Fantasy is fun as fuck. And parlays as well. I didn’t get to bet this week because I was hungover from the aforementioned party.

I just spoke to my crush. She posted a selfie story with her mask on but her nose was showing. I told her to cover her nose. She said she doesn’t because she likes her nose. I agree. Her nose is cute.

A lot of girls like my nose. That happened with that flirtatious girl. And this other girl… And many girls asked me if I had worked done on my nose. No. I haven’t. I wouldn’t. I have a pretty nose despite having Jewish blood. I never even heard of a dude getting a nose job. Women are obsessed with noses. I guess I look at them… but it’s never a turn on or turn off (I mean.. unless you know… honky funny nose).

A lot of typing.

I don’t know what’s next.

I could write another book!

I should write more stories!

I want that cover story to come out.

I also talked to my crush about that. I asked her if the rest of the family read it. They have. That should be a cover story soon. I hope it doesn’t get edited much.

It’s almost 2 pm and I haven’t had breakfast and it’s almost already night time. I fucking hate this new schedule.

I woke up late because I stayed up all night playing Rocket League… I’m not that lazy (I am). More Rocket League next. More Rocket League forever.


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