It feels like I haven’t written anything in a long time. I guess two weeks is a long time. I remember I got busy. I’m not sure how or when or what I did. But I got busy.
I did one photoshoot for the magazine, I haven’t done that in what feels like years. It was nice and straightforward. It is for what will be a very controversial cover. That comes out tomorrow.
It’s about the coronavirus.
The thing that we all keep talking about. It dominates everything. All interactions with the world. Except for Starcraft. Only when Mario brings it up. Or I also bring it up because I want to know how my friends are doing.
I like that part of my life. Sometimes I think I don’t have any friends because everyone on social media is posting how they are isolating with friends or girlfriends and I have no one but my cats. And then I remember, I have my virtual friends, who aren’t really virtual, but real friends.
I’ve known all of them since childhood or early teens. And we used to play Age of Empires, old Starcraft, and many other video games back then. And we still do now. The year 2020.
Pablo is all the way in Edinburgh. Which makes the matches oddly entertaining. When is midnight for us, it is morning for him. When it is morning for us, it’s dinner time for him. So the possibility of Starcrafting with friends is… almost all day.
I’ve been doing that a lot as well.
I don’t really improve much except now I can play with Zerg and my APMs go over 100. Yay me!
Starcraft and friends talk. No one cares about that. The rest of the friends are also spread around the world. It makes me happy to play Starcraft with them. Thank you for that, friends. Though I get pissy when I lose.
Fuckin’ aye do I hate losing.
I got busy.
After that Saturday photoshoot for work, a friend asked me if I could do a photoshoot for her. She wanted a sexy photoshoot. She’s turning 30 soon so… you know… why not? Plus boredom.
I should share one of those photos. This one…
Her with my book. BUY IT HERE.
There are better shots. There are vertical shots which I prefer. But there are also a lot of horizontal shots to get her whole body.
I haven’t posted any on my social media except stories. She has posted two.
I took almost 2,000 photos. I used the shitty cheap lights I got from the office. A lot of the shots are 1600 ISO which is not ideal at all, but those lights aren’t very bright.
The shoot also turned sexier and sexier and sexier as we got more comfortable as photographer and model. We also drank a bunch of beer, which probably helped.
I edited down to 450 shots. Still way too many. Still undecided on which ones I will publish. Still unsure which ones she will let me publish.
I was going to charge her $150 which is my standard charge for a photoshoot (though WAY shorter than this one). But to make it happen, I just charged her pizza and beers. I let her choose the beers. And well…
I also got busy with something that doesn’t pay me.
Making beer videos.
I’ve made four videos so far. This is the first one:
I don’t really remember why I decided to do that.
That’s a lie… I REMEMBER!
I even wrote it on my whiteboard: “Do a video to talk about your book.” So I did one with Norte beer just a tryout to talk about my book. It was horrible.
On my second attempt, I did it with a bunch of beers I got from Licor de la Sexta. When I grabbed the beers, I had no idea I was going to try to do a show with them and my tuxedo. But with the need to feel productive, I did it. That second attempt is the video above. No editing. No nothing. Just whatever came to my mind. I talked way too fast. I was nervous about the camera even though I was by myself.
People… liked it.
I didn’t expect that response. For people to even watch it. But they did. So that inspired me to do a second video.
That inspired me to do another video. This one:
I chose my insane looking face as a thumbnail on purpose. I honestly, can’t rewatch them. I don’t like looking or hearing myself. So yeah. Whatever I said is what I said.
After that, my homie Joshua gave me some free Colima beers. So I did the show with Colima beers which I fucking love.
And finally… The beers I drank with Giovy (the sexy girl). Since we drank the beers, I just decided to rank what I drank throughout the week. And I like the best. The ranking.
Here’s the last video:
She brought 7 beers (we drank more). Transpeninsular’s was the worst. The Uruguayan beer was fine but nothing excitable. The rest were good… EXCEPT… FUCKING EXCEPT…
One of the beers I hate the most. Honey Orange by Legion. That’s the last video. Ranking of the beers. Then me drinking that beer.
And I lied. I didn’t finish the beer. I tried… I really did. I don’t like wasting beer. But I ended up throwing it in the sink.
That was it. I don’t feel like doing beer videos anymore. The excuse is that it is too hot out to wear a tux. Perhaps I’ll do one video tonight, but I’m not that inspired.
I got three more free beers. They were all decent but nothing to rave about. That’s why I want to do the next show. And I like the ranking show best. So I think choosing 10 beers that I drank in the past few days and ranking them is the best way to do the show. I will, perhaps, do that tonight.
I got busy. I also did a photo shoot on Monday for my friend Tony Tee all the way in San Diego. I feel shitty because I promised him a second one, but the border wait time was intense the other Monday so I failed. Fuck the border.
And after that… my busyness started going down. And now I am doing nothing. Nothing. Nothing…
As for the rest. I’m still broke. I haven’t paid rent in April for my apartment. I haven’t paid for my parking in two months. But there is money at the end of the tunnel. Or whatever.
I got published a couple of times. I did one photo gig. And the payment from Amazon for the first month of my book is coming to me! That’s… a whopping $400!!!
That’s… rent. The month of February I sold that. March I sold less than half of that. And April less than half of March.
I didn’t sell a single copy today. Not one copy in the last three days. Only 57 pages read in KU which gives me less than a quarter.
There go my book sales.
And I’ve been pushing it. Not as much as the beginning, but no one else is going to buy it. I already bugged all my friends.
As for the future… I’m not sure what is next. Moving to Ensenada is not going to happen. Moving to Alaska is not going to happen (there’s still a very slight chance, but in reality, I’m not going anywhere). My gigs are gone, not only cuz of the corona, but mostly gone. In May, I usually work an event and make over $1,000 in that weekend. Not this year. This year it got canceled.
And a lot of other shit has been canceled.
I can’t do tours either, which was my back-up plan to financial distress.
I have no idea what is going on in May…
One thing I have decided… I’m writing the next book. I have already decided that… and I wanted “everything to fall into place” so I can have the time to write. That’s all bullshit. I just don’t want to write it. I have to force myself to write. I have it in my head. I wrote some parts of it. I know how I want it and what to do next. I just have no motivation.
My new motivation is… I’ll finish that fucker by August. That way I can have two books that sell little! That’s exciting. And if I write another one, I’ll have three. And so on until I have 10?
Maybe then I’ll make some money?
That’s how writers work… I think…
Same with the videos. I’m supposed to keep doing them if I want to profit. But I’m tired.
Also. I get a roommate soon. That’s going to help with rent.
I would write more about corona. If you want to read more about corona. This.
THIS… is what I mostly agree on. I didn’t even know who Charles Eisenstein was… but I dig his writing. Yes. It is a very long post. No. I don’t agree with it all. But I do agree with most of it.
“A life saved actually means a death postponed.”
That and many other quotes hit me. Society’s fear of death is odd.
Also, I must confess. I fucking hate wearing a mask. It hurts my ears. It reminds me that my breath stinks. My iPhone doesn’t recognize my face. My sunglasses fog up.
I forgot I deleted my Instagram for a couple of days. A few days after that, I was thinking of creating a different account for only sexy photoshoots. I don’t have models or enough sexy pictures, so I decided against it. I also never decided on a name.
It would be a great social media experiment though. My food Instagram has a ton of followers that I have no idea who they are and it is way more popular than my regular Instagram. An Instagram that only features sexy girls would be a hit. I would expect to have over 1,000 followers quickly. But it is too much work. Perhaps when I do more sexy shoots…
It would be a nice way to make money.
Girls. Hit me up.
I don’t judge.
No… wait… I do. Just girls.
Wait… I need money. Guys too. Or whatever in between. Photoshoots. Just pay me.