I am doing nothing.
I didn’t sell any books through Amazon yesterday. None have been sold today. Two were sold two days ago (one Kindle, one Paperback). Three were sold the day before that (all Kindle).
That’s about it for March…
15 books sold and it’s almost half the month. I’m giving up. I am not sure where to go after this. No more bookselling though, that’s for sure. That’s not making me any money. I made around $70 this month selling my book. I need to make that every day… or at least every two days. Not every two weeks.
I am doing nothing.
I told my editor I was going to pitch him my ideas last week, I haven’t. Articles that I started that I never wrote. Here are some ideas.
- La Pinche Línea. I’ve recorded every single time I crossed all of 2019.
- The oldest song in Tijuana is a jazz song about Kansas City Bar. I can’t find that bar, I’m sure it doesn’t exist. But just the general jazz scene.
- My trio of lovers, my favorite three dive bars.
- That’s… about it.
I have other ideas. But those three are my favorite ones. I should email the boss soon. After I post all this stupid shit.
I am doing nothing.
I am nervous about my future. Losing guaranteed $900 a month is a big chunk of cash. I thought the book could replace some of it monthly, but it won’t. I could do tours and replace that, but interest doesn’t seem to be there at the moment. I got some emails about tours, but way into the future. I had a gig tomorrow that got canceled because of the stupid Corona Virus. I started checking daily for jobs on Indeed and Craigslist, I’m not sure that’s the path I want to take. I’ve always wanted to work at Trader Joe’s. That sounds nice. I’m not sure if that’s the path I want to take.
So… I am doing nothing.
And the fucking Corona Virus. Fuck man. You know it’s serious when Seth Meyers doesn’t wear a suit and his audience doesn’t laugh at any of his jokes. That last “Closer Look” was sad.
But is it really that serious!?
I lost $150 because of it. That’s all I know about that fucking virus.
The virus is inspiring people to do fucking nothing.
I’ve been in this apartment for 6 fucking years. The apartment I’ve lived the most in my life. Lasted one year in the West Hollywood apartment. Lasted less than two years in the Marina de el Rey apartment. Lasted less than 6 months in the house over at shitty PQ. Lasted less than 6 months in my first TJ apartment. Lasted less than 5 months in a tiny backroom at my parents’ old place. Lasted less than a week with crazy Chapter 9 of my book, Miss Pale Happiness. Lasted less than a year in the apartment that I moved in right below that crazy chick.
This apartment. 6 Fucking years.
And even before West Hollywood… It was college. 4 years of the same campus, but 5 different places. Lived on Tommy Hall 251 (or St. Thomas Aquinas building). Lived in… fuck do I remember the name. Benet? Was that it? Those two years were living with Woodawg47.
I just went on Google Maps to explore my old college. It was Bernie or St. Bernard building in my sophomore year. That’s when I met my first love. She used to park illegally by the art building in her shitty red Trans-Am. My favorite memory of her was the one time everyone left for some break, it might have been Thanksgiving, but I’m not sure. The whole campus was empty except the two of us. It was like everything was for us. We watched Brokeback Mountain, but twenty minutes into it we started fucking and didn’t watch the movie. We showered together though they were dorm showers, there was no one in the fucking building except us fucking. We even went to the football field and fucked over there because… again… there was no one around. I loved her so much. I still do.
Benet was in my sad junior year after that relationship ended up in disaster. Before Benet was Seton. That was even more depressing. Junior year was a very depressing year. I barely even remember it.
That summer between junior and senior year, I was a paparazzo with my brother. And went back to school as if nothing.
Senior year was fun. I lived in a house with five of my friends and only had night classes and other small classes to finish my degree. Senior year was the one that made me take out more student loans though I dropped out the ridiculously overpriced meal plan, I was still living in the ridiculous overpriced student housing. And I was working the underpaid student work thing. I worked the mongo grill for half a year. That was my favorite. I also worked at the sandwich-making station. I would steal 5 to 8 sandwiches every time I worked there because… well… I needed food.
I got fired by someone younger than me. And almost immediately found work at the music office where I did absolutely nothing but answer some calls and do little errands.
That was college.
Not sure why I wanted to type all of that out.
I guess I just want to write stupid shit.
New cover with the Reader!
Like almost every other week:
There’s some text in there by me as well. Here’s a link. My text is towards the end.
The only texts I’ve been working on are special issues. That changes today. I’m going to write at least 5 feature stories this year. Perhaps more.
This year. I write.
And do nothing.
I want to do nothing so bad.
From all the nothing I’ve been doing, it has been mostly trying to sell my fucking book. Because that doesn’t happen, I get depressed and do nothing.
Yesterday, I went to Verbatim Books in North Park to leave my book. They only accept two books and they split the commission 50/50. For this reason, I priced it double the amount. No one is going to buy it for $30. But at least it will be on the shelves and people will look at it and perhaps they’ll be like “ooo I should find it on Amazon.” From what I know, the book stays there for 6 months. I want to message them and be like “drop it down to $20.” Probably no one will buy it for $20 still… but it’s far more reasonable than $30 for the book…
So just buy it on Amazon.
I really… REALLY… believed that the book over at Pasaje Rodríguez would have been gone by now. I left 20 copies. They still have 10 copies. In two weeks, I sold 10. That’s not how it was supposed to go. I really thought that in a week I would sell them all and I would have to order more.
No one buys books. Fucking reality.
Just everyone says they will buy it and no one does. And it’s not worth the effort, I barely make a penny for each book sold. I need to sell thousands to be alright. And that’s not happening.
I still have 15 in my possession. I’m doing a book giveaway through Instagram to get rid of three and hopefully get more people to buy it. It probably won’t work.
Look for the book giveaway on Instagram if you want a free book!
And I still have that tour / Reddit meetup next week. And with that… March will be over. And I have nothing else to do to promote the book. That’s it.
Back to work.