15 Weeks, 3 Days: Nightmare Week Starts Soon – Great Weekend, Tons of Work – Moving On is Healthy

15 Weeks, 3 Days.

For the first time since January 19th, I sort of forgot the count.

It’s not like I count on purpose… just every day I woke up thinking how long it has been.

And this week, it sort of passed me by.

I knew Saturday was week 15, though I had my doubts.

I started to lose count.

Which makes me feel bad. I still think about mom every day. And even cry a bit.

But time to move on?

Not like that.

January 19th will always be in my mind. It’s my niece’s birthday. It’s when my life suddenly changed.

Moving on is necessary for everything. Or at least many things.

A friend is having boy trouble. I advised her what to do months ago. She didn’t listen. Her troubles got worse. And now she’s mad at me for giving her shitty advice.

And my advice is to move on.

Social media makes us sick.

We think we don’t have to move on. We get offended if someone blocks us or deletes us.

But that’s what was natural in the world. You just stop communicating with people. Friendships fade. Lovers go away. Nowadays, we have to be connected to everyone.

It’s easy to move on.

Sort of.

I had a great week.

Before my nightmare weekend.

I worked a lot. A fucking lot. I was in the office for quite some time. Finishing projects. Working pictures and clients. Finishing some texts. 

It was my nephew’s birthday on Friday. Besides going to the mechanic and getting Donatella new tires… I went to play video games with him all day.

He got three new Wii games. All Mario (Galaxy 2, Sluggers, and Strikers). He loves Mario. And Donkey Kong. And anything Nintendo related. 

I had a couple of beers with my brother and his wife and left their place at around 9:30 pm.

I wanted one more beer to end the night.

It was way more than just one.

Ended up going to Nelson like always. Except it was Friday night. Fuck Friday nights. It was packed.

I ordered a caguama and regretted it almost immediately. Fuck. There’s nowhere to sit. The bar is full. The tables are full… I sat at the end of a booth awkwardly, the other half was occupied.

Just survive the beer and leave.

A cute girl with weird eyes was staring at me. I’ve seen her there plenty of times drinking by herself. Getting semi-plastered. She looks young.

She walked by me and fuzzed with my head. An indication of “yo boy, come talk to me cuz I want you.”

I didn’t.

A friend from a punk band went by. He didn’t see me. So I surprised him by grabbing his titty.

He liked that. Cuz he tossed himself in my direction and started giving me kisses like a slobbery puppy.

He then invited me to the table. I walked over and I only knew one girl from the group. It was a big group. And it was an uncomfortable table. And at the same time… a seat on the bar opened up.

I went for the bar seat instead.

The table seemed uncomfortable. And I wasn’t in the mood to chat up a group of strangers. I know I would just sit there awkwardly and not say a thing.

So the bar is better.

There was a girl across the bar from me talking to the bartender who got off work. They seemed to be hitting it off. Good for him.

But she was staring at me.

I have 0 game.

She stared and smiled. And I did the same.

Never moving from my seat.

At all.

Thought about telling the bartender to send her a drink on me.

Fucking lame move.

So I didn’t do anything.

Just sat there.

Looking back whenever I felt like she was looking my way.

And I ordered another beer.

To see if I got the courage to say hi.

I didn’t.

My excuse.

She was with a friend on one side. And no seats next to her.

How am I going to talk to two people at the same time?!

So I didn’t.

Just drank the beer.

I was about to finish my beer and leave when she came over to me. She said something along the lines of “I got tired of staring at you, come sit with us.”


I had a wild night with her. A very Tijuana night. I ended up dancing in La Estrella. I felt guilty because we didn’t even buy a beer. We just went in. Danced for a few songs. And bounced.



I haven’t danced in like two years.

I stepped on her toes only once.

I’m a horrible dancer.

Better than most 6’4 skinny white people. Never had one lesson. Maybe I should.

“You… your girlfriend is a great dancer. You… YOU!!! You not so much.”

That’s what the father of the bride said last time I danced…

Saturday morning, we had breakfast. For the second time in the year, I didn’t have to work on Saturday. So we spent the day together.

After a late breakfast… we started drinking.

She likes grimy places, like the ones I used to hang out forever ago. So I tried taking her to La Nueva Pachanga… it was closed, seemingly for remodeling. Okay. Another grimy one. Copacabana.

Also closed.

WTF Zona Norte?! Why you change so much?

Tenanpa it is. It’s so nice and clean now. There was a Xolos match and the Canelo fight that night. But we started drinking early, more eating, and more drinking. And we were back at my place when those events were happening. Missed out on them. Gallos lost 1-0 on their last game of the season. It did not matter. I was hanging out with a great girl and having tons of fun.

On Sunday, my nephew had his birthday party. After so much drinking, I wasn’t going to at all. But at some point, someone took out Tecate Lights. Fucking ew. But I indulged.

After two, I craved real beer. And kept drinking at Dandy’s Del Sur. Bumped into friends. And it rolled until after 1 a.m. when I told myself I should be in bed by midnight.

That was my weekend.

It was great.

Monday was work from home. Didn’t do much, cleaned the apartment for a bit, went to two meetings, then some eating and drinking like always.

And now, Tuesday. Tomorrow I cross the border. And I work the whole weekend. Thursday to Sunday. I am spending a night or two in San Diego for this. Because this is one of my most important weeks for work.

Earning $$$$.

Spending $$$$.

The more you make. The more you spend.

Oh yeah.

This was the cover last week:

My ex-girlfriend is in the inside on some pics I took of her here at my place. She liked how her nails looked. And that’s about it. She’s still one of the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. Can’t believe I dated her. In a way, I’m proud of my ex-girlfriends. Which is somewhat weird. But I am.

Since the cover was about hip hop fashion, the idea was to dress her up and have a great photoshoot. But I got sick and never did that. I think I blogged about this already…

I took selfies with the clothes.

I hate wearing hats. And I needed a haircute. Already got that.

Editor liked the pics, but she wasn’t convinced about me being in the picture again. So my ex ended up doing me the favor of modeling really quick.

There were more pictures… They chose the very first one I took. Inside of the mag in a small thing.

I took a couple of copies of the mag to her yesterday. She liked her nails. And maybe in the future when I need a model, she can help again. After all, there is a new fashion column.

Time to get ready for my nightmare week.

Gear packing. Talk to the second shooter. I got the passcodes. Move a screen and MacBook Air. Oh yeah. I got an extra screen for editing. That makes the MacBook Air more bearable. I still want a MacBook Pro.

And on top of that…

It’s Mother’s Day Weekend.

That’s the point of the event…

I took my mom to the event last year. It was the last time we had fun together. It still my profile picture. Before 4 pm she was drunk on wine. And we grabbed a Lyft together back to the border.

I always tried to take her to events with me. Get her out of the house. I miss her so much. And it still bugs me that I didn’t see the signs…

Which reminds me…

Work had me visiting an old people’s hospital.

It was horrible.

My mom would have never been happy like that. Just staying alive for the sake of staying alive. She wanted to be young. She was. But didn’t see much hope…

I haven’t talked to my aunt either. She was a rock for a while. I miss you to tía. Sorry I haven’t texted.

Now I need breakfast.

And enjoy my Tuesday.

Cuz the nightmare starts on Wednesday and doesn’t end until Monday.

Then I pay rent. It’s my birthday shortly after. Renew plates for Donatella. And get ready to leave for a while. Vacation time.

I mean… I will still have tons of work to take care off before I go. But yeah.

Not blogging for a week and there’s so much blog back up.

I saw Bumble Girl. That was on Saturday when I was with the other girl. I honestly didn’t notice her until after she passed me by. And I heard “OMG it’s Matt.”

Since we parted ways and don’t talk anymore, I wasn’t sure what to do. I kept walking. I feel like she stopped to say hi. But I didn’t.

I also saw that girlfriend who is not a girlfriend. She looked beautiful. But she was also meeting with my best friend who is not a friend.

I blocked them both.

I still think about the drama. And I still feel like I’m on the right path.

Moving on.

Moving on.

Moving on.

That’s what life is sometimes about.

Moving on. We meet countless people in our life. Those who inflict pain (either they realize it or not) don’t need to be around.


Just got off a phone call for work! This week is going to be HEAVY!

Luckily, I have a room to crash in in San Diego and border concerns should be minimal.


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