Marital issues.
How dramatic.
Mexico City trembles and so did my marriage.
How fucking dramatic.
I’m not even married.
Mexico City. 32 years later decides to shake again. My parents moved from there after the earthquake in ’85. Well… a year later. I was born, and they decided to move because Mexico City was too dangerous for three kids.
I thought about living in the city. Many friends live there.
My thoughts and prayers to Mexico City.
^
That’s bullshit.
Like the rest of the people, I care about family and friends first. From what I know, they are all safe.
I messaged my friends from Querétaro first. A light message, jokingly but still checking if everyone is fine. They were. Jokes turned into seriousness. And fuck. The videos of buildings shaking fucking hurt.
The video of the preppy couple in the apartment suffering and begging to god is fucking scary.
I have no fucking clue what I would do in that situation. It sucks to imagine it. I guess documenting would be my natural reaction.
Speaking of documenting.
I documented this morning’s sunrise through my kitchen window.
It’s cloudy, very grey, with a tinge of orange.
Of course I took pictures!
Let me saturate the fuck out of them first. Then do some Plotagraphs effects… and post!
Well… here it is non-edited and edited. It looks like this.
Wow. On the big screen they both sort of look like shit. It didn’t help that the window glass in the kitchen is filthy. And there is too much shit on the ledge to open it.
I’ll do the Plotagraph thing later. And perhaps post. Maybe. Not sure now that I see they look like shit on the big screen.
Great…
Now that’s 6:42 am I got sleepy… I’ve been awake since 2 am.
I slept on the couch and begrudgingly went into the room at 3 am.
When you look back at things, it looks fucking stupid. The fights.
I know I’ve written this before. That we had our biggest fight ever.
Well… this was the biggest fight ever… so far.
And like in any relationship, I hope it’s the last but I know it won’t be.
Relationships fucking suck.
They are time and effort and a lot of work.
And that’s basically what the fight was about.
…..
…
It hit me hard. I’m tired and I need to work a lot today. It’s 6:46 am. My brother is picking me up in an hour or less and I have three appointments in really far directions in San Diego.
Early one in El Cajon, then time to kill, then Escondido, then Ramona, and then back.
Gotta go all the way to fucking Ramona.
That’s what I did most of yesterday. I made phone calls and figured out the rest of the shoots of the week. Like mentioned before, Friday is set and should be a lot of fun.
Today is set, and it should be okay.
I have to make more phone calls today because some people didn’t answer.
Point is. A lot of work to do.
After emails emails emails and coffee coffee coffee. And one fucking push-up because I’m still sore. My legs still hurt, but my body ache is gone.
There. I did ten push-ups just to prove it. My wrist still hurts a lot. But push-ups are doable now.
I ain’t doing them though because I got work all day today.
People say they like my rambling. How I go from one thought to the next without really context or reason. Just skip!
My brain went that direction.
I get up and walk around the apartment and get coffee. Or do push-ups.
AND THEN WRITE WRITE WRITE.
My alarm is set to 7:30 am. It’s so tempting to go back to sleep since I’m at the point that if I close my eyes I go bye bye.
But I know 30 minutes is not enough sleep and I’ll just wake up really pissed….
Fuck.
Why did we have to have that fight?!
It was all going okay. Sort of.
I took the long walk to Plaza Fiesta to meet my girlfriend over there because it was Tap Tuesday and she told me to meet her over there.
We met at the photo lab because I left film to be developed there.
SURPRISE!
No pictures.
It sucked.
First time shooting medium format film… and… I blew it completely. The film came out completely blank!
Cool beans, huh? I’ll go back to shooting iPhone pictures and oversaturating them for Instagram likes.
The entire roll of film is blank with some black blotches. Minimal. Nothing to really print out.
The old dude at the lab told me the shutter on the camera was probably not working. I looked at it this morning. He is right. And I think I see a crack on the lens. Probably not worth fixing.
The shutter button makes the noise. But the lens does not open/close. Or at least from what I can tell. So it is not entirely my fault the film was shit. It’s also because the camera doesn’t work and I was naive enough to put film and use it.
Putting film on that bitch was complicated.
Sidetracked galore.
After the disappointment of my first medium format shoot being shit… we walked around Plaza Fiesta to see where we could have a beer.
Tres Fuegos does not adhere to the rules of Tap Tuesday and told us it started at 6 pm.
Well.. there goes two clients.
Then she said, “let’s walk back home.”
FUCKKKKK THAT!
I walked all the way to Plaza Fiesta to walk home? No. I’m drinking beers.
She wanted yogurt ice cream. We walked to Plaza Rio for that.
She wanted mineral water. We went to go get mineral water.
She wanted to go to Teléfonica and not eat (for some odd reason) and at the same time bitch about how expensive it is and not have any money. So it went back to wanting to go back home walking.
Nope. I walked all this way. I’m getting a beer.
Back in Plaza Fiesta, we bumped into Caro our neighbor. We started drinking in Fauna with her.
Then we went to Insurgente and Caro stayed behind chatting with some people.
I wanted food and suggested places. Everything was no because it wasn’t the pizza she craved. I wanted to check out the new video game place and she went with me… and lasted almost nothing in there.
After this, I was little pissed… I’ve been meaning to check out that place for months now. And I couldn’t be there for more than five minutes….
It sounds so fucking childish.
But it escalated from there.
And we went our separate ways.
I didn’t go directly home.
I didn’t want to see her.
She was in our room when I got home at around 8 pm.
I didn’t see her. Just messaged her on the phone that I didn’t want to see her.
I slept on the couch.
Neither of us slept much.
At 2 am she was texting me.
I still didn’t want to do anything with it.
“It” being the fight.
The relationship.
Our situation.
The future.
Two more weeks and we’re supposed to be in paradise. The vacation started to sound stressful. Not because of us, but because of money.
And that’s one of the reasons we get into fights.
We are good now….
After talking until dawn. She went to work. I want to crawl back into bed and sleep for a couple hours.
Fuck. My brother is picking me up soon and I could easily just close my eyes and sleep… fuck…
Weak coffee.
Fuck.
Cold shower. Perhaps that will fix everything…
Matingas 